Tis another suffocating summer swelter in the Lone Star State; the kind of mugginess that makes your buttcrack sweat even in the evening. This heat isn't good for hot chocolate, safe upward extensions of the arm, corduroy pants, nor hipsters that think cutoff jeans are stylish (or ever were for that matter), but it is good for one thing in particular: ice cream! Yes, this is the perfect evening for some ice cream with a righteous place down the road to go. That being said, Amy, her dog, Snoopy, and yours truly all started our walk for
Amy's Ice Cream of course.
Well, when we got there the line was whack, Amy had to stay outside in the sauna with Snoop dog, she couldn't decide which flavor she fancied and said she'd just have a bite of mine, I told her another place would have to freeze over before that happened, and tensions were pretty much flaring up all around when one of the scooper dudes tried to do a trick with the ice cream and dropped it on the ground. Pit stained arms went up in accordance with grumbling in the crowd about a mutiny, and being closest to the door I decided to get out while I still could.
As fate would have it, we walked another couple of blocks further to get a pint at the corner store and came upon a bum before we could cross the street. Anticipating his begs I was instead caught off guard when he asked if I had any food. We were empty handed. Rather than consider him wildly un-observant I took this as a genuine request. I know what you're thinking. We got the chocolate chip cookie dough flavor. While walking back home I gave the bum the sandwich and chips that would've never been necessary had it not been for all of the people in front of me pissed off about ice cream at the other place. The bum's response was priceless, "Whoa! Cool BEANS!!" Ha! He also apologized for his appearance and for asking me for money before, but said he hadn't eaten in days. I reminded him that he didn't ask me for money, but for food. He replied, " You have a good heart. I don't know what your brain is like, but you have a good heart." To this bizarre bean: I should've gotten you a beer too...
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